zeroth law

i adopted Schrödinger's cat
it mirrors my observations
therefore, logically, it sees me

lost and found box, 
a superposition of self
projected onto subatomic particles 

duality of a measurement
captured in fields, lost in complexity
found and separated in symmetry 

open box, unleashed with certainty

dear kinetics of deeply felt logic,
     you are melancholy to observe

lost laboratory
of hypothesized emotions, 
experimental experiences

Feynman diagrams
freelance sex work

searching for protons
throbber icons inside stripping solutions

chaotic conference
black coffee, milk, macroscopic brown
blink blink
microscopic stable states, milk, equilibrium
irreversible iris

i named Schrödinger's kitten Kelvin
third law of thermodynamics

heat is a physiological phenomenon
hope the caffeine wakes you up to 
witness science as a human endeavor

simplified in papers
gatekept in patents 
political peer review 
often led by unmeasured, unexamined human incentive

knowledge production precipitates from a supersaturated solution

a former mentor advised:
why don't you shut the fuck up
and not get entangled with these trivial human matters

my Warhol whimsy
therefore, logically, laughed out of science spaces, seriously
deemed categorically confused

i will defend, until data proves otherwise
mixing modes of abstraction and embodiment
is not confusion, it is method

my thinking is indecorous
my metaphors are not decorative

a former mentor praised my passion for truth
gave me courage to walk out of every space that unwelcomed
     my childish, colorful
     ways of looking at the world
thank you, roman check

i misplaced myself
in measurement 

in a stale solution

sahar khan
bell's lab, 2026

pen illustration